Update..

It has been a long time since I have posted anything on here, for those out there at home who are wondering what is going on in life I'm sorry. Life has been a roller coaster. For several years I have said I wanted to write a book, and over the past several months, I am begining to look back at my short life to see all the things I have done and the knowledge I have gained. I have decided to slowly start writing this book. It is not something that will be done any time soon, but I figured that I should start it. I am going to title it "Fly by the seat of my pants....with God"

The past several years of my life have been a journey, one that I have enjoyed. The past several months have been a journey, one of lessons, a deeper understanding of life, a depper knowledge of God and justice. It is a journey I have taken, and I have loved but as with most things there have been trials. This has been no different. Since mid July I have found myself asking several questions ones I do not know the answers to, ones I do not plan on knowing the answers to. This deep level of question has forced me to seek out answers which create more questions.

I have been interning with a ministry the past few months which some of you know about, its called the Ramp. It is a great ministry, one I love and have enjoyed being apart of. My season is up here, and I moving on to something different. I have had the opportunity to learn and gain information like never before. I have had the opportunity to get closer to God and build a deeper relationship with him, my foundation is firmer than before, and my heart is happy, but at the same time I am missing many things. I am excited about the next chapter of my life. It will entail a move to a city, not completely sure of what city I will be moving to, but there are two in the picture for sure and possibly a third. It will mean the beginning of my career/ministry in an odd way, and it is all exciting. I can not give out more details than that right now, but in the next few weeks I think I will know the definite of life. I think that life is full of adventure and as I keep following God, I keep flying and my life is being changed daily. What more can I ask for?

Bucket List

For those of you who do not know, I have this quote that I live by and hands down it is my favorite quote. I probably hear it in my head at least five times a day and because of it I have created my bucket list and thought I would share it. What the heck!

• Become scuba certified
• go sky diving
• drive a race car
• travel to at least half the countries in the world
• Find the true meaning of justice
• Feed millions of people
• Work in at least 1/4 of the countries in the World.
• Adopt at least one kid from each continent
• Backpack thru Europe
• Sail around the world
• Build houses for people to live in rent free
• Change the world
• Fly a plane
• Hike the Swiss Alps
• Ski in Colorado
• Bungee Jump in another country
• Travel to all 50 states by car
• drive a motorcycle
• Own a hand gun
• Go scuba diving in the great barrier reef
• Risk it all for what I dream about...
• Fall in love
• Run a marathon
• Go hiking through the jungle
• Learn the guitar
• Learn how to dance...I have two left feet and I'm horrible at it
• Ride a bull
• Go parasailing in a tropical location still to be decided
• Fly a hot air balloon
• Climb Mount Everest
• Ride in a helicopter
• Ride on the ten biggest roller coasters in the world
• Break a record of some kind
• Go to the Cherry Blossom Festival
• Ride down the Panama Canal
• Become a famous photographer
• Travel to war torn areas and take pictures
• Open a restraunt
• Write and publish a book
• Stay young
• Live in Budapest
• Go on a safari
• Live in a village
• Help put an end to homelessness
• Find out what world peace really means
• Debate an issue with the President and win the debate
• Speak to a large group of people about the topic of my choice
• Buy season tickets to OSU games and attend each of them including "away" games
• Take a cruise to Alaska
• Stomp on grapes and make wine
• Get my doctrate
• Make a difference in at least one person's life
• See the world change
• Go completely Green
• Sleep for a whole day for no reason other than because I can
• Have my own football team
• Go to Grace Land
• Camp in the Grand Canyon
• Go to the Amazon
• Make a documentary
• Write a movie
• Shoot a machine gun
• Build a tree house and live in it
• Own a monkey
• have no fear of failure

Risk more than others think is Safe,
Care more than others think is Wise,
Dream more than others think is Practical,
Expect more than others think is Possible

Rough Ride...

It has been awhile since I have been on here...sorry to all of you who are wanting to know what is going on. I am back from Italy, and I am back from India...I can't stand being back, and daily my heart is breaking because daily I am realizing that I was not created to sit by and watch goes on around the world, and because I was not created to be in America.

I am convinced that there is something in my DNA that is created for to things awakening and being in other countries. When I am in the states something inside of me is missing, its being denied. I can honestly say that when I'm in another country I am at my happiest. I am completely happy with nothing to tear that down. In the midst of what might be going on in the country, and what I might be seeing, even though my heart breaks for them and the developing issues at hand, I am the happiest. It is like my heart has found where it belongs.

When I came back to the states I moved to Alabama. I currently reside in a town that has absolutely nothing in it, and for the most part I do not like it one bit. I am doing an internship that is interesting to say the least. I am trying to understand a few things but nonetheless I know the Lord is teaching me and guiding me despite how much I do not like being here.

Since coming back from Italy and India I have been applying for jobs all over the world. I am hoping to obtain a job in Washington, DC or New York City. I am not sure how that will work out or if it will happen but I am being hopefull that it will and that by the first of the year I could be moving to one of those places, or Colarado, Maryland, Florida, Ethiopia, Malaysia, or California. I promise I have applied all over the place, and I am excited about it. I have applied with some amazing NGO's and IGO's that would be wonderful to work for. Im praying something opens up and I can go be with friends in these places for at least a period of my life.

Because I am sure you are wondering, India was absolutely amazing. My heart breaks daily because I am not there in that place with those children and with those people. I absolutely love it. I love it. I want to go back, and there is a strong possibility I might be going back this year.

I traveled to several different orphanages, and found several children I wanted to bring home with me. While I was on this trip my mind would run crazy about ways you could help develop and work to a holistic approach to helping people there especially the children. I am really looking forward to implementing these ideas and to seeing what happens in the near future!

The Demand...

As you know, Im constantly researching and research spurs thoughts, documentaries do the same thing as well. I was watching a forty five minute documentary on Demand, by Share Hope International. In case you do not know, sex trafficking is an extremely large social justice issue today that you see world wide..it is something that ultimately needs to be ended. The issue of trafficking as a whole is something that needs to be worked on. I think of the number of people who are trafficked into the U.S. each year, and I wonder if we are doing our job correctly? What about border control, and documents how are people getting on planes without the proper documents? How do people get into the U.S. without proper documents?



You see, the whole thought behind this is that the reason it is an issue is because of the demand. If there was no demand there would be no need for it. Media plays a huge role in the problem. People do not wake up one morning and say I want to have sex with a girl on the street etc.

Sites that say just barely legal whether it is porn, or it is on a window in another country, the vast majority of the time they are well underage. There are all forms of trafficking whether it is prostitution...just because you think they are prostitute and they are out there because they want to be does not mean that is the life they have chosen for themselves. The vast majority of the time a prostitute is a victim of sex trafficking, and it is hard to leave once they are in not because they do not want to but because they are constantly in debt to the pimp.

When we gain knowledge what do we do with it? How do digest the knowledge than raise awareness about what we have learned? This is a battle I am still fighting. I am still trying to learn what to do about these things, but what I do know is I have a voice, and I am going to share what I learn here and hopefully my thoughts will spark interest and you will begin to learn on your own about what is going on.

Traveling through....

Today was one of the days I have been looking forward to all week. We traveled to several different orphanages to see several different children. These kids were precious, and the smiles were priceless.

I love the moments when the Lord whispers little nuggets to your heart. I wish they would have been for saturday but they weren't. They were reminders of his promises, and of his love. They were little pieces of information that didn't help me understand the circumanstances of things, but that gave me piece about life. I do not understand how one heart can have as much love as it does, but on the flip side how one heart can endure so much pain. I wish I could express into words everything that has been going on inside but I can't, and I'm not sure I would want to. All I know is that being able to love on these kids today was the best part of my week, and being able to love on some kids tomorrow and saturday will be even better!

My heart belongs here...

India has been a one heck of a journey, and I have thrived off of every almost car wreck, off of the beauty of the hearts of the people we encounter, and the children. It has been one of the best weeks I have had.

We finnished up a pastor's conference this evenning, and I can say that the Lord has definitely moved. As much as I might question things, I know that I serve a living God who constantly shows up, and is still doing everything. The services the past few days have been long and intense to say the least. It has been hot and you get sweaty but the people are hungry for more. I definitly believe the fire is falling here. I have seen the Lord deliver people, I have seen them healed, and I have seen the joy in their hearts as they learn about him.

The next few days are going to be extremely exciting. We are headed out to travel throughout the district. We will be going to different orphanages in the area, and Lord willing to the tribal village which are people who are considered to be untouchables. Im definitely excited just to be able to walk with them, shake their hand, and capture a picture if they let me. On Saturday the team and myself will spend the day at the big orphanage up the road with the kids playing and having fun, but we will also be having a service. I am going to be speaking on two things I believe, but Im not a hundred percent sure yet. Im paraying that these children encounter the Lord in a mighty way, and I am believe for some miraculous healings to take place physically and emotionally.

I can tell you this, I do not want to leave this place. There is so much that I want to do here....

What is it....

There is something about the past couple of months that has me turned upside down, wondering and questioning and seeking, and trying to find something. Im not sure what it is...it could be answers, understanding, love, depth to life....I do not know.

Im learning more and more each day and being challenged each day, that Christianity and being a Christian is not what we say it is. I can yell all I want that I am a Christian, but what good does it do to save someone who you do not have a relationship with or who might jump right back into the things they were doing when they walk out of the room. To get someone saved, and think that everything they have struggled with is done, I believe that you are crazy. I do believe in some situations and cases that can happen, but I also know that there is more to this whole thing.

Each day that I spend questioning, researching, and living in another area, is a day closer to realizing a lot. Im realizing that Im not called to be some ordinary missionary who gets up and preaches. That is not my job, that is not where Im meant to be. I am meant for something different and something greater. I know I am supposed to be working in Asia, and Africa. My heart explodes in these places and this where Im the happiest, but I also know it is not typically missionary work that I am supposed to do. I am not supposed to be up preaching, I am suppsed to show the Love of God through day to day things, and show the people who He is through relationship.

I do not know what it is, but I know that the Lord is up to something. Im not satisfied with ordinary, Im not satisfied with easy, Im not satisfied with no answers. I am not satisfied with things the way they are. I want to see things change, I want to see life happen, I want to see freedom, I want to walk out a life of Christianity, Im not sure I want to do it behind a pulpit all the time though.

As Christians, how are we supposed to live? how do we walk out this lifestyle?